Because I expect the question: what does breathing have to do with sex? We breathe!
I will only tell you this: deep and relaxed breathing helps your body function from a state of presence and awareness, from a state free of stress and fear—states in which breathing is short and rapid, putting the body in a state of alert, a state that makes you want to run or hide because the mind perceives imminent danger. This is a state you do not want to be in when you want to initiate a sexual act.
Furthermore, the way you breathe is the way you connect with your partner on an intimate level; a relaxed, deep breath conveys the message to a person that they are safe in your arms, that they can trust themselves to let go into feeling. So, first of all, in order to be in connection with another person, you must first be in connection with yourself.
Basic breathing – with eyes open or closed, inhale and exhale gently through the mouth, because it will allow you to relax your jaw as well.
Do not force yourself to breathe in a certain way, just breathe like this for a few moments. Relax your shoulders, chest, stomach, lower back, and pelvic area, and let the breath penetrate as deeply as possible inside you.
Breathe consciously 20 times and try to bring your breath throughout your entire body, paying attention to what you feel in your body. Did you feel tension anywhere? Which part of your body did you feel more relaxed? Did certain images or thoughts appear in your mind during the breaths? What did you feel after opening your eyes? Has anything changed around you; do you feel different?
Try to breathe consciously a few more times throughout this day and pay attention to the state you are in before you begin and the state you are in afterwards.
Breathing for connecting with your sexual being – to be connected to your sexuality, it is necessary to bring your breath into the areas of the body where you feel desire, that is, instinct and genital organ. By practicing this breathing, it will become part of you, which means you will always be able to access your power.
You can practice sexual breathing while sitting on a chair, in a comfortable armchair, or while lying on the bed. Until you get used to this process, however, sit on a chair or armchair with your feet on the ground.
Close your eyes, inhale and exhale deeply through your mouth a few times. Relax your shoulders, back, chest, abdomen, pelvic area, and legs one by one.
Place one hand on your chest and breathe deeply 10 times, directly into your chest. Fill it with air completely, then exhale everything; visualize how your chest fills with air or a warm, white light, and feel the breath with your palm. Try to notice if you feel any tension in your throat, shoulders, or chest, and if so, bring your breath into those places to release the tension.
Lower your palm to the level of the solar plexus, and breathe, inhaling the air into your stomach; feel how it inflates, then exhale until you feel it empty completely. Inhale and exhale like this 10 times, and at the same time try to feel how you are creating space through this breath—inhaling power and confidence, exhaling everything that is not beneficial to you.
Move lower, place your hand on your genital organ, and bring your breath into the pelvic area. Inhale and exhale deeply and feel how this whole area relaxes; the greater the relaxation, the more open you are to accessing your erotic energy.
Inhale and exhale 10 times, conscious of this breath in the genital organs.
Erotic breathing – this breathing makes the connection between the throat, chest, stomach, and genital organ, being a type of breathing that gives you erotic power, while at the same time creating in your body a state of excitement within relaxation, not in the restlessness you have likely experienced for a long time. And this is the healthiest point from which you can meet a person and have sex with them.
Start by inhaling through the mouth and bring your breath down to the level of the genital organ. Perform 20 such breaths.
When you inhale, contract your pelvic muscles, and when you exhale, relax. (if you don't know how to perform the contractions or want to tone them to have a better erection or to control your ejaculation, see my program in courses for him/her)
Perform 20 such breaths and pelvic muscle contractions.
For the best possible connection with your erotic power, perform 3 cycles of breathing as follows:
20 slow and deep breaths in the genital area without contractions
20 rapid and powerful breaths
After you have performed these 3 cycles, finish with 3 breaths as follows:
Inhale through the nose and exhale through the mouth 3 times, and on the 3rd inhalation, hold your breath and contract your vagina/penis muscles, legs, abdomen, chest, and facial muscles. Maintain as long as you can, then exhale deeply while relaxing your whole body.
Now pay attention to what you feel and ask yourself the following questions:
Do you feel stronger, more open, or more relaxed?
Are you aware of the tension that was in you before the breathing session?
Did you feel during the session that you were resisting something?
Answer these questions and pay attention to what you feel next time you do these breathing exercises, because wherever you feel tension, it means you can also release it. n